Facing Your Fears (Part 2)

Okay, I've never done a blogging series before, so I hope you'll bear with me. I'm still feeling my way through this thing. Well, let's dive right in, shall we?


In my last post, I discussed how fear is an emotion that both helps and harms us. I also mentioned how it can be a pretty serious Muse-killer if we allow it to be. In the comments section, we talked about our fears at different stages in the writing process. These three were the ones most likely to have us waking up in a cold sweat:

Fear of FAILURE: This is probably the most obvious of the three. You know the feeling. You find an agent, but she can't sell your story to save her life. Or, you find a publishing home but the book tanks. Or worse, it gets all sorts of press---only it's the bad kind. Pick your scenario, but they all end the same way; namely, with you curled up in the fetal position in the corner of your bedroom, sucking your thumb.

Fear of "WRITING LIMBO": This fear is similar to #1, but with a subtle difference. It's less about the crash-and-burn and more about never having the chance to crash in the first place. It's that infuriating mental brick wall we writers lovingly refer to as "writer's block." It's getting stuck in the quicksand of endless revisions. It's querying the same story for what seems like years and never getting past form rejections. If that stuff doesn't give you the heebie-jeebies, you ain't serious about writing.

Fear of SUCCESS: At first glance, this last fear seems a little nonsensical, doesn't it? Picture the pinnacle of success for a writer: a seven-figure book deal, a big-budget movie offer, a spot on Oprah's Book Club AND the New York Times bestseller list... Who in their right mind would be afraid of that? Someone who thinks about what comes next---how to surpass all those lovely expectations you've set for yourself. After all, you're only as good as your last book, right? How on earth do you top Oprah's book club? What if you run out of things to say and nobody likes you ever, ever again?

I'll bet some of you out there are thinking this post is a little...well, depressing for your taste. If so, I don't blame you; it's a bit of a downer to me as well. But here's the thing: our fears can never go away unless we face them. We have to look them square in the eye and not flinch, not even for a second. This is the first step: calling them what they are, giving them a name.


Part 3 is the hardest part, doing what it takes to move past them. Are you ready?

Facing Your Fears (Part 1)

Everyone is afraid of something. You can be the biggest, baddest, most outrageously muscle-bound guy or gal the world has ever seen, and there will still be something out there that scares your shorts off.

For me, it's cockroaches. Can't stand the things. I used to work in an office that where they jumped out in broad daylight and literally looked you in the eye. No matter what our pest control guys sprayed at them, they would not die. Ugh. Just thinking about it makes me queasy.

Anyway... Moving on.

My point is, fear is instinctive; it's built into the fibers of who we are as living creatures. Heck, animals have that whole fight-or-flight response down to a science. Just try sneaking up on a grizzly bear in the forest and see how Mr. Friendly reacts to being startled. (Okay, don't actually try that. I don't want to get sued.)

In the right context, fear is a perfectly healthy---and at times even life-saving---emotion. Fear is what prompts us to teach our children about "Stranger Danger," for example. However, if we give it too much control, it cripples us. It holds us hostage and crushes our dreams before they even have the chance to take flight. And that's what makes it so dangerous. Fear doesn't allow us the opportunity for failure or success. It only keeps us stuck where we are.

As a writer, fear is your greatest enemy. It can turn your Inner Editor from a soft and helpful whisper into a whiny, nagging scream, one that tells you every sentence, indeed, every single word you put down on paper is wrong, wrong, WRONG. It can keep you revising the same WIP for 15 years, yet at the same time convince you that it should never see the light of day. And if you let it, fear will ensure that you always remain an aspiring writer, never a published one.

You deserve better. Don't let your fears do that to you. Starting today, let's face them together.

It's sharing time now, boys and girls: What fears do you have about your writing?

Shadow Play: Thoughts About Writers And Depression

I've been in a weird, tired, cranky mood lately, and it's doing some not good things to my writing. For one thing, I haven't touched my WIP in almost two weeks. For another, I'm having a really rough time composing blog posts. I started at least three or four this week, but for some reason I couldn't finish any of them. Even writing about how much I don't feel like writing is proving difficult.

I'm convinced this is a nasty phase that will pass in a few days, but that doesn't make getting through it any easier. I don't care for myself when I feel this way--and I'm sure my DH doesn't, either! Coincidentally (or not), Colleen Lindsay posted a link to writer Colin Rowsell's blog, where he started what might be the most thought-provoking discussion on writers and depression I've ever seen. Many of the stories told there were deeply moving, mainly because I could relate to everything my fellow writers said. Reading their words was like walking through a funhouse of mirrors; the images I saw took different sizes and shapes, but in the end, they were all very much like me.

There. I said it. I am one of the thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands, of writers who has struggled with chronic depression. It is the gloomy cloud that has followed me throughout my teenage and adult life, and it has taken me to some devastating places. Over the years, I have fought hard to overcome this invisible nemesis; some battles I've won and others I've lost. Ultimately, it is my belief in Jesus, support from family and friends, and some occasional professional help that keep me from falling headlong into the darkness.

Surprised? Don't be. Chances are, if you don't suffer from the same thing, you know someone who does. Especially if you're a writer.

Ours is a lonely, isolating craft. We have a unique ability to see the beautiful and the ugly parts of humanity, and like a mirror, we reflect what we see back to our readers. It is both a gift and a curse. The loveliness is exhiliarating to witness and thrilling to capture--I could spend all day writing about the birth of my son, for example--yet the evil is equally disturbing, and that is what drives so many of us to pills, to the bottle, to despair, to suicide. We must have both sides of the coin. It would be impossible to for everyone to write about sunshine and rainbows all the time; the challenge is for us to observe the shadows from a distance without becoming consumed by them.

I don't have all the answers. I wish I did. I only know what I do when depression rears its disgusting head and tries to take away all that I have worked to obtain. I breathe, step away from whatever I'm working on, regroup and try again later. I allow my husband and son to make me laugh. I eat really good chocolate and drink delicious, satisfying tea. I seek support from other writers who have felt the same pain. I pray until the storm passes. And it does. Every time without fail.

Because in the end, it's all just shadow play.

5 Things To Do When The Magic's Gone

I'm not sure if it's the miserable weather, the sluggish economy, random, widespread peevishness or all of the above, but lately I've been seeing a lot of posts from writers who have the blues. And in most cases, it's on both a personal and a professional level. If you're not going through it now, chances are you've experienced it at some point in your writing career. You know the feeling; you can't really put your finger on it, but you just have a general "meh" attitude about everything. Like Grumpy Bear from the Care Bears with the raincloud picture on his chest. Not a happy camper.

Well, you can add my name to the list. I've been in that boat all year, and I'm just as clueless about my "meh"-ness as you are. It's as if the power has short-circuited in the creative part of my brain, and since I don't know which fuse has blown out, I can't fix it. Know what I mean? I just keep thinking, What gives, man?! I'm a writer. Words are supposed to just--ya know, appear--in my head, right? Right?

So. What to do? I've been thinking about it all week, and recently I came to an interesting conclusion. In my humble opinion, the act of writing is similar in many ways to a long-term relationship. The longer you do it, the easier it is to get into a routine, and although it's good to have some structure, too much can kill your Muse the same way it can kill a marriage. When that happens, some of the same suggestions relationship experts give to couples can help you regain your passion for writing. Bear with me; this analogy is a good one.

1. Remember why you fell in love (with writing) in the first place. I'm reminded of the movie Brown Sugar, a romantic comedy starring Taye Diggs and Sanaa Lathan. The two of them play best friends who realize they're also soulmates, mainly due to their mutual love of Hip-hop music. Music plays an integral role during the ups and downs of their relationship, and in the end, it is what brings them back together after a falling-out. It should be that way for writers as well. Remember what it was like to fall in love with words--the power of that moment--and write about that feeling.
   
2. Listen (to your inner writing voice). This idea applies primarily to your characters. You know that moment in the writing process when your characters seem to jump off the page? That's not you going crazy--it's the magic coming out. Listen to it, even when it doesn't make sense. More importantly, learn what your unique writing voice sounds like. We each have one, and even if it tells you to write something silly or impractical, do it anyway. Drowning it out with logic it is the first step toward permanent writer's block, and besides, you never know where that weird little voice might lead you.
   
3. Try something new. Are you a stickler for composing at the computer? Try writing longhand for a few weeks. Work exclusively in your home office? Take a field trip to your nearest library or park. Sometimes a simple change of scenery or writing medium is all it takes to get the creative juices flowing again.
   
4. Enjoy the little things. Like most careers, writing is a job that emphasizes the big accomplishments--publication, bestseller status, a three-book deal with a six-figure advance. We all want those things, but let's not forget about all of the wonderful little milestones we encounter along the way. Finishing a novel, for instance, is a remarkable achievement, and it's something millions of people will never do. Celebrating the little victories will keep you energized on your way to the big ones.
   
5. It's about the journey, not the destination. It's easy for us writers to get so caught up in the goal of publication that we forget to enjoy the process of writing itself. We rush through everything, cranking out stories the way Kraft cranks out mediocre slices of cheese. Then, we wake up one day and find we've lost touch with our characters, themes and the voice that brings our stories to life. We may want to publish our work, but first and foremost, we are storytellers. As long as we remember that, our Muse--whatever form it takes--will never be far away.
   

Welcome to Procrastinators Anonymous

ME: "Hi, my name is L.C. Gant, and I'm a procrastinator."

YOU: "Hi, L.C."

Welcome to the first meeting of Procrastinators Anonymous, a multi-step program that uses group therapy to give less-than-motivated individuals (particularly writers) a good kick in the pants to get them back to work. Take a seat. Relax. Have some chips and dip. We're gonna be here awhile.

So, why are you here? What mindless task stole your writing time today? Did you spend countless hours friending people on your favorite social networking site? How about updating web content that's already been updated five dozen times today? Or, are you more like me, tempted to read everyone and their grandmother's blogs at the expense of your own?

Hmmm... I hear crickets. Did I hit a nerve? (*wince*) Sorry about that. Perhaps I came on a little strong.

Very well. I'll start. I'm here because recently my characters sat me down for an intervention. "We can't go on living this way," they cried. "You brought us to life, carefully crafting our hopes, dreams and fears. You were the one who gave each of us a problem to solve, a world to save, a nemesis to defeat. And then, when we needed you most, you always found something more important to do. You've left our stories unfinished for months, even years at a time, and all because you were too afraid to dig deep enough into your psyche to write the hard stuff. The big, messy, confrontational, climatic scenes. For one reason or another, you just didn't want to go there.

"That, dear writer, is unacceptable," they told me. "Our stories need to end, or come to some sort of resolution at the very least. You can't leave us hanging in the cosmos forever."

They threatened to walk out on me, to kidnap my Muse and ride off into the sunset, leaving me weeping and gnashing my teeth. I promised them I would call a meeting and find others like me. I know you're out there. I can't be the only one who has half a dozen unfinished novels lying around.

And that's why I'm here. I have a problem and I need help. I can't seem to give my novels (and the characters they contain) the attention they deserve. I have commitment issues, and now my characters have abandonment issues. I want to change. I want to start the healing.

Now, who else wants to share?

To Sleep, Perchance to Dream...

Here's an easy question: When's the last time you suffered from writer's block? Perhaps a better question would be, what writer hasn't buckled under the weight of this inexplicable, often maddening condition? Call it what you will--an affliction of the mind, a symptom of stress, or what happens when your Muse takes a vacation without your permission--the fact is that whenever it occurs, it's pretty darn aggravating. And if it persists long enough, it can become toxic to even the most successful writing career.

I guess all of that was a roundabout way of saying WB sucks. I should know. I'm dealing with a rather nasty case of it right now myself, which I blame mostly on the fantastic insanity of the holidays. Between my letdown from the end of NaNoWriMo (the highlight of my year, people!) and the hubbub of continuous social gatherings, my writing gear always winds up on pause from December 1 all the way until the second week in January. Over the years, I've learned to anticipate the event and plan accordingly, but that doesn't make it any less frustrating. So, if any of you guys are in the same boat right now, trust me, I feel your pain.

However, it's a new year now, time to reboot the ol' creative hard drive. And I'm happy to say that I've found the perfect way for us writers to get our mojo back. Take a wild guess. Are you ready for this? C'mon, admit it...You're on the edge of your seat... No? Well, you should be. Give up? Alright, here it is...

Go. To. Sleep.

That's it. Seriously. If you haven't discovered it by now, dreams are a writer's best friend, an absolute gold mine of ideas just waiting to be dug up and written down. If you don't believe me, take a look at this article I found on scribblepad.co.uk about how to effectively harness your dreams. I particularly like "Idea #4: Pay attention to how your dreams affect your writing."

"Do you find yourself eschewing writing after you experience certain types of dreams, such as nightmares? Do other dreams seem to invigorate you? If so, you may want to seriously consider working on overcoming the inability to work. Look for these types of psychological patterns after dreams and learn how to work with (or, if necessary, against) them. You may have underlying issues that need to be addressed before you can write at your personal zenith."

Aside from the use of peculiar words such as "eschewing" and "zenith," I found this idea fascinating. I would also add that the reverse is true, too: pay attention to how your writing affects your dreams. For example, I find that I tend to have a lot of dreams about children and pregnancy whenever I've spent too much time away from a work-in-progress that I enjoy, and some dream analysts suggest that in dreams, such images represent hidden creativity. Many times, your subconscious will remind you of stories your conscious mind has buried...and sometimes it will give you ideas you would never consider while awake...

Try writing down your dreams for a week and let me know how it turns out. You just might be surprised at the results...

Update: Two nights ago, I had a dream that gave me a phenomenal idea for a novel, a retelling of a well-known Greek myth. I find that the more I write down my dreams, the easier it becomes for me to remember them. So try it out for awhile, even if you have a hard time remembering your dreams at first. You never know what might happen... It worked for Stephenie Meyer!