Facing Your Fears (Part 2)

Okay, I've never done a blogging series before, so I hope you'll bear with me. I'm still feeling my way through this thing. Well, let's dive right in, shall we?


In my last post, I discussed how fear is an emotion that both helps and harms us. I also mentioned how it can be a pretty serious Muse-killer if we allow it to be. In the comments section, we talked about our fears at different stages in the writing process. These three were the ones most likely to have us waking up in a cold sweat:

Fear of FAILURE: This is probably the most obvious of the three. You know the feeling. You find an agent, but she can't sell your story to save her life. Or, you find a publishing home but the book tanks. Or worse, it gets all sorts of press---only it's the bad kind. Pick your scenario, but they all end the same way; namely, with you curled up in the fetal position in the corner of your bedroom, sucking your thumb.

Fear of "WRITING LIMBO": This fear is similar to #1, but with a subtle difference. It's less about the crash-and-burn and more about never having the chance to crash in the first place. It's that infuriating mental brick wall we writers lovingly refer to as "writer's block." It's getting stuck in the quicksand of endless revisions. It's querying the same story for what seems like years and never getting past form rejections. If that stuff doesn't give you the heebie-jeebies, you ain't serious about writing.

Fear of SUCCESS: At first glance, this last fear seems a little nonsensical, doesn't it? Picture the pinnacle of success for a writer: a seven-figure book deal, a big-budget movie offer, a spot on Oprah's Book Club AND the New York Times bestseller list... Who in their right mind would be afraid of that? Someone who thinks about what comes next---how to surpass all those lovely expectations you've set for yourself. After all, you're only as good as your last book, right? How on earth do you top Oprah's book club? What if you run out of things to say and nobody likes you ever, ever again?

I'll bet some of you out there are thinking this post is a little...well, depressing for your taste. If so, I don't blame you; it's a bit of a downer to me as well. But here's the thing: our fears can never go away unless we face them. We have to look them square in the eye and not flinch, not even for a second. This is the first step: calling them what they are, giving them a name.


Part 3 is the hardest part, doing what it takes to move past them. Are you ready?

Facing Your Fears (Part 1)

Everyone is afraid of something. You can be the biggest, baddest, most outrageously muscle-bound guy or gal the world has ever seen, and there will still be something out there that scares your shorts off.

For me, it's cockroaches. Can't stand the things. I used to work in an office that where they jumped out in broad daylight and literally looked you in the eye. No matter what our pest control guys sprayed at them, they would not die. Ugh. Just thinking about it makes me queasy.

Anyway... Moving on.

My point is, fear is instinctive; it's built into the fibers of who we are as living creatures. Heck, animals have that whole fight-or-flight response down to a science. Just try sneaking up on a grizzly bear in the forest and see how Mr. Friendly reacts to being startled. (Okay, don't actually try that. I don't want to get sued.)

In the right context, fear is a perfectly healthy---and at times even life-saving---emotion. Fear is what prompts us to teach our children about "Stranger Danger," for example. However, if we give it too much control, it cripples us. It holds us hostage and crushes our dreams before they even have the chance to take flight. And that's what makes it so dangerous. Fear doesn't allow us the opportunity for failure or success. It only keeps us stuck where we are.

As a writer, fear is your greatest enemy. It can turn your Inner Editor from a soft and helpful whisper into a whiny, nagging scream, one that tells you every sentence, indeed, every single word you put down on paper is wrong, wrong, WRONG. It can keep you revising the same WIP for 15 years, yet at the same time convince you that it should never see the light of day. And if you let it, fear will ensure that you always remain an aspiring writer, never a published one.

You deserve better. Don't let your fears do that to you. Starting today, let's face them together.

It's sharing time now, boys and girls: What fears do you have about your writing?

Decisions, Decisions...

To everyone who sent me words of encouragement and virtual hugs during my recent slump, I have two words for you: THANK YOU. I mean it. Muah! It was just what I needed. I'm doing much better this week, and it's a good thing too, because I can't afford to crash and burn right now. I have entirely too much to do.

Here's the deal: I live in Florida, where, in case you've been living under a rock, the housing and job markets have been utterly demolished. To make matters worse, the cost of living here is obscenely high, particularly in our neck of the woods. Don't get me wrong: I love Florida. Warm weather all year round, plentiful sandy beaches and easy access to Disney World--what's not to like? Before the country fell into a financial abyss of awfulness, it was a great place to live. Of course, now...well, now it's not so hot (pardon the pun).

So, it looks like my hubby and I have some decisions to make. We're quite blessed in the sense that we're not tied to a home right now, so we can feasibly move as early as this summer. Texas is the most obvious choice, since it's where most of our family is and it's one of the few states that has managed to thrive in this recession. Another major plus? Our son is young enough to make a seamless transition. The question is, should we make that step? Can we afford it? Will we be able to find jobs, a new place to live and get everything packed in time? These are the questions that have been spinning through my head for the last few weeks.



The issue is coming to a head for us now because we're rapidly reaching a point of no return. We have a very small window of time to make this move happen, otherwise we'll be stuck where we are for at least another year. I guess that's my problem. It seems like everything would have to happen so fast. I don't do fast changes well, at least not like this. I was raised by two meticulous planners, folks who needed a week's notice whenever I wanted to have a play date in elementary school. Like them, I like months and months to get my ducks in a row before a decision like this, but it looks more like I've got weeks. It feels like days. And that freaks me out.

My husband will be meeting with his boss on Monday to request that he be transferred to Texas, if that's what we decide to do. We've given ourselves the weekend to commit one way or the other. And what a long, prayer-filled weekend it will be--even more than usual for Easter.

Everything in my gut is pointing me toward this move. I really don't think we can afford to live here another year. But still. Change is hard, especially when it flies in your face like a spaceship jumping to warp speed (did I mention my parents were also Trekkies?). I suppose that's what separates the kiddos from the adults in society. Grownups make the hard choices so the munchkins don't have to, and apparently I'm a grownup--or so says my driver's license. But I must confess I don't feel too grownupish today.

What do you think? Am I overanalyzing everything? What would you do, given what you know about my situation? How do you go about making major, life-altering decisions in your family?

Are You Up For A Challenge?

Greetings, all! When it comes to freelance writing, I pride myself on working efficiently and producing high-quality results. However, it seems like whenever I pull out my fiction projects--which aren't paying me a dime--the right side of my brain seizes up and refuses to cooperate. I've said it before and I'll say it again: I'm a recovering procrastinator. *sigh*

Fortunately, all is not lost. I've discovered a simple treatment for my condition, one that makes it much easier for me to release the stories inside me that are just dying to get out. I need accountability. That's why I've been able to commit to this blog (more or less) for the past month, even though I've failed at every attempt I ever made to keep a journal. I don't love writing any more now than I did when I wrote my thoughts in a secret notebook. I just keep at it because I know someone out there is watching me.

It's also the reason I've done so well during National Novel Writing Month. Although I've never "won" by writing the full 50,000 words, I write more during that contest than at any other time of the year, simply because I have a support system. I have people cheering for me, urging me forward, and I do the same for them. We all have the same goal, and we're rushing towards it at full speed.

Well, now I get to have that experience all over again, thanks to fellow writer Melissa Marsh. She created an event called the Just Write Challenge, and I like to think of it as a smaller, more customized version of NaNoWriMo. Instead of everyone pushing to write 50k, we each get to set our own writing goals for the month. Those who reach their individual finish lines will receive fabulous writerly prizes. It's like a marathon where you can run as far and as fast as you want; in the end, everyone wins!

I love the concept, so I jumped on board as soon as I found out about it. My goal is a simple one; I want to write 1,000 words per day on my current WIP, a YA sci-fi novel that I started last November. I'll be chronicling my JWC adventures here at RLGL throughout the month so you can take part in every step of the journey.

Thanks a bunch to Angie Ledbetter over at Gumbo Writer for spreading the word about this great event! Check out the JWC info page on Melissa's blog for all the details. It's not too late to get involved. I just got plugged into the JWC blog yesterday, and everyone there has been wonderful. So, what do you say? Are you up for joining me in the Just Write Challenge?

Are You Better Than The Average Writer?

I'm not ashamed to say I'm a pretty faithful follower of literary agent Nathan Bransford's blog, and today's post is a perfect example of why that is. Take a look.

Is that not the most awesome conversation starter ever?! Needless to say, the discussion got very exciting very quickly. I love debates, so of course, I had to jump in and argue my case. There were quite a lot of comments, so for the sake of simplicity, I've reposted my thoughts on the issue below:

I'm surprised at how many people either "played it safe" with their answers or didn't answer at all. I answered "yes" right away, no hesitation. I don't consider that arrogant at all.

This is an industry that will eat your confidence for breakfast if you let it. In order to even get in the door, I have to convince you (the agent) to believe in my ability to tell a story. I have to sell my point-of-view to you. So, if I'm not confident that my work is better than average, why should I expect you to think it is?

I agree that it's difficult to tell the quality of someone's writing just from blog comments; personal blogs are a better indicator of that. However, I disagree that you can't know whether you're a good writer or not. I've seen enough "average" writing to know I'm better than average.

Do I still have a lot to learn? Absolutely. But I know my skill level. There's a difference between arrogance and confidence. Arrogant writers think they're perfect. Confident writers know where they need improvement, but they also know how they stand out from the crowd.

Hard work and "luck" aside, this business is all about standing out from the crowd.

Great question, Nathan! I had fun thinking about it!

Time for you guys and gals to share now. And let's tweak the question just a tad: Do you think you're better than the average writer...not just on this blog or any blog in particular, but better than the average writer in general? If yes, why? If no, why not?

Welcome to Procrastinators Anonymous

ME: "Hi, my name is L.C. Gant, and I'm a procrastinator."

YOU: "Hi, L.C."

Welcome to the first meeting of Procrastinators Anonymous, a multi-step program that uses group therapy to give less-than-motivated individuals (particularly writers) a good kick in the pants to get them back to work. Take a seat. Relax. Have some chips and dip. We're gonna be here awhile.

So, why are you here? What mindless task stole your writing time today? Did you spend countless hours friending people on your favorite social networking site? How about updating web content that's already been updated five dozen times today? Or, are you more like me, tempted to read everyone and their grandmother's blogs at the expense of your own?

Hmmm... I hear crickets. Did I hit a nerve? (*wince*) Sorry about that. Perhaps I came on a little strong.

Very well. I'll start. I'm here because recently my characters sat me down for an intervention. "We can't go on living this way," they cried. "You brought us to life, carefully crafting our hopes, dreams and fears. You were the one who gave each of us a problem to solve, a world to save, a nemesis to defeat. And then, when we needed you most, you always found something more important to do. You've left our stories unfinished for months, even years at a time, and all because you were too afraid to dig deep enough into your psyche to write the hard stuff. The big, messy, confrontational, climatic scenes. For one reason or another, you just didn't want to go there.

"That, dear writer, is unacceptable," they told me. "Our stories need to end, or come to some sort of resolution at the very least. You can't leave us hanging in the cosmos forever."

They threatened to walk out on me, to kidnap my Muse and ride off into the sunset, leaving me weeping and gnashing my teeth. I promised them I would call a meeting and find others like me. I know you're out there. I can't be the only one who has half a dozen unfinished novels lying around.

And that's why I'm here. I have a problem and I need help. I can't seem to give my novels (and the characters they contain) the attention they deserve. I have commitment issues, and now my characters have abandonment issues. I want to change. I want to start the healing.

Now, who else wants to share?

Why Do You Write?

Janet Reid, literary agent extraordinaire, had the most amazing quote on her blog today from writer Arne Garborg. Truer words were never spoken:

"For money you can have everything it is said. No, that is not true. You can buy food, but not appetite; medicine, but not health; soft beds, but not sleep; knowledge but not intelligence; glitter, but not comfort; fun, but not pleasure; acquaintances, but not friendship; servants, but not faithfulness; grey hair, but not honor; quiet days, but not peace. The shell of all things you can get for money. But not the kernel. That cannot be had for money."

-Arne Garborg, writer (1851-1924)

The last three sentences are what really got me. They capture with perfect eloquence the reason why so many of our beloved celebrities have such bizarre, destructive lives. Brittany Spears, Michael Vick, Lindsay Lohan, Michael Jackson... Heck, I could go on for days. They all have the shell of a wonderful life. They appear to have everything: fame, power and beauty, most of which is gained by having a certain amount of money. But they don't have the kernel. So the best things in life still elude them.

Now let's add a new dimension to this idea. In an ideal world, what would writing give you? Bestseller status? A phone call from Oprah? Multiple homes in NYC, L.A. and Miami with great ocean views? It's perfectly okay to want all of these things (I know I certainly do), just as long as you don't expect them. Editorial Ass, a.k.a. "Moonrat," says it far better than I...be aware, fellow writer, that the odds are very much against us.

Alright, before the more melodramatic among you reach for your drink of choice, remember that there is hope. One need only browse through your local Barnes & Noble or Borders to see that indeed, books still being bought and sold. Millions, probably billions, all over the world. Shocking, I know, but true. And out of all of those millions upon millions of books, a handful will become bestsellers and earn their authors a call from Oprah. A handful.

But you know that already. That's not the point. That's not why you get up before the sun or stay up long after it goes down, is it? Didn't think so. If you're like me, you do this thing we call writing because you love it, because deep down inside, you feel compelled to tell stories. You do it because there is something beautiful inside of you that needs to get out, and that something comes out whenever you put words on paper. You do it because it's what you were born to do.

So the money doesn't matter, or at least it shouldn't. If it comes to you, it's a wonderful bonus and you'll celebrate like you've lost your mind. But if it doesn't... Well, you'll survive, won't you? Because all of that extra stuff, it's just the shell anyway. It's not the kernel. The kernel is what you're doing right now. Writing. That is what "cannot be had for money."