Facing Your Fears (Part 3)

Ugh. I've avoided writing this post for a long time because I was afraid of it. Yup, you read that right. I've been afraid of writing a post about facing your fears. Go figure.

I suppose what's made it so difficult is that at the end of the day, I don't have the answers, only the questions. Scoff if you like, but at least you know the truth: I've been writing for years and there are still plenty of things I don't have figured out yet. I'm like many of you---just stumbling around and trying to find my way. And how do you give advice about something you can't do yourself?

That, in essence, is the whole reason I started this series in the first place. As with my writing, I blog from my life, the good, the bad and the ugly. For better or worse, I put my struggles out in the open because I never want to give the impression that this stuff is effortless. That doesn't help anyone. Writing about the challenges forces me to work through them, along with reading advice from my wonderful followers :-) I love getting different perspectives on the issues we all face in our craft.

So, how do you face your writing fears? What do you do when that huge, horrific monster rears its ugly head and gnashes its razor-sharp teeth? At this point, the only answer I've come up with is that you suck it up and make yourself write anyway. Scared you're out of ideas? Start writing about the room you're in and what could happen there. Seriously. Scared you'll never get published? Give yourself a deadline to finish a story and then start querying, no matter how crappy it is. Scared you'll get published and your novel will flop? Write another book that's better than the first one so more people will want to read it.

I know you were looking for something fabulous and profound, something that would totally blow your minds, but right now that's all I've got. Other writers have said the same thing far more eloquently, but this is my version of it. The longer I write, the more I realize there are no easy answers to being successful at it. You just have to do it, and do it, and do it, and do it some more. Then one day, some glorious shiny day that's as bright as a new copper penny, it pays off. And man, is that payoff ever sweet when it comes.

Facing Your Fears (Part 2)

Okay, I've never done a blogging series before, so I hope you'll bear with me. I'm still feeling my way through this thing. Well, let's dive right in, shall we?


In my last post, I discussed how fear is an emotion that both helps and harms us. I also mentioned how it can be a pretty serious Muse-killer if we allow it to be. In the comments section, we talked about our fears at different stages in the writing process. These three were the ones most likely to have us waking up in a cold sweat:

Fear of FAILURE: This is probably the most obvious of the three. You know the feeling. You find an agent, but she can't sell your story to save her life. Or, you find a publishing home but the book tanks. Or worse, it gets all sorts of press---only it's the bad kind. Pick your scenario, but they all end the same way; namely, with you curled up in the fetal position in the corner of your bedroom, sucking your thumb.

Fear of "WRITING LIMBO": This fear is similar to #1, but with a subtle difference. It's less about the crash-and-burn and more about never having the chance to crash in the first place. It's that infuriating mental brick wall we writers lovingly refer to as "writer's block." It's getting stuck in the quicksand of endless revisions. It's querying the same story for what seems like years and never getting past form rejections. If that stuff doesn't give you the heebie-jeebies, you ain't serious about writing.

Fear of SUCCESS: At first glance, this last fear seems a little nonsensical, doesn't it? Picture the pinnacle of success for a writer: a seven-figure book deal, a big-budget movie offer, a spot on Oprah's Book Club AND the New York Times bestseller list... Who in their right mind would be afraid of that? Someone who thinks about what comes next---how to surpass all those lovely expectations you've set for yourself. After all, you're only as good as your last book, right? How on earth do you top Oprah's book club? What if you run out of things to say and nobody likes you ever, ever again?

I'll bet some of you out there are thinking this post is a little...well, depressing for your taste. If so, I don't blame you; it's a bit of a downer to me as well. But here's the thing: our fears can never go away unless we face them. We have to look them square in the eye and not flinch, not even for a second. This is the first step: calling them what they are, giving them a name.


Part 3 is the hardest part, doing what it takes to move past them. Are you ready?

Facing Your Fears (Part 1)

Everyone is afraid of something. You can be the biggest, baddest, most outrageously muscle-bound guy or gal the world has ever seen, and there will still be something out there that scares your shorts off.

For me, it's cockroaches. Can't stand the things. I used to work in an office that where they jumped out in broad daylight and literally looked you in the eye. No matter what our pest control guys sprayed at them, they would not die. Ugh. Just thinking about it makes me queasy.

Anyway... Moving on.

My point is, fear is instinctive; it's built into the fibers of who we are as living creatures. Heck, animals have that whole fight-or-flight response down to a science. Just try sneaking up on a grizzly bear in the forest and see how Mr. Friendly reacts to being startled. (Okay, don't actually try that. I don't want to get sued.)

In the right context, fear is a perfectly healthy---and at times even life-saving---emotion. Fear is what prompts us to teach our children about "Stranger Danger," for example. However, if we give it too much control, it cripples us. It holds us hostage and crushes our dreams before they even have the chance to take flight. And that's what makes it so dangerous. Fear doesn't allow us the opportunity for failure or success. It only keeps us stuck where we are.

As a writer, fear is your greatest enemy. It can turn your Inner Editor from a soft and helpful whisper into a whiny, nagging scream, one that tells you every sentence, indeed, every single word you put down on paper is wrong, wrong, WRONG. It can keep you revising the same WIP for 15 years, yet at the same time convince you that it should never see the light of day. And if you let it, fear will ensure that you always remain an aspiring writer, never a published one.

You deserve better. Don't let your fears do that to you. Starting today, let's face them together.

It's sharing time now, boys and girls: What fears do you have about your writing?